Cracking COVID couture

Jane Stranger of Erskineville is no stranger to chancing upon trends: “Spotted in Newtown, a handbag covered in RPA COVID stickers, very colourful as a different colour is used for each day. A teenager? Gen Z? No, a woman of a ‘certain age’. Ahh, we’re never too old for fun.”

“Stay with me on this one,” advises Andrew Taubman of Queens Park. “There are infections that change behaviour, such as toxoplasmosis which makes rats careless and more likely to be eaten by cats, thus continuing the toxo lifecycle. Has anyone else noticed that asymptomatic COVID carriers inevitably seem to have visited an improbably long list of widely-spaced places just before they get diagnosed?”

“This morning I heard a newsreader say that a rider in the Dakar Rally had lost time after ‘struggling with navigation issues’,” notes Georgie Tuck of Quakers Hill. “I look forward to using this phrase the next time I get lost.”

“I know that we are under constant attack by Americanisms, but every time I hear or see the word ‘normalcy’ it grates,” says Steve Hulbert of West Kempsey. “I wish for normality to be restored!”

“If a ventriloquist working live to an audience dons a mask, would he or she be questioned as not clever because mouth movement can’t be visually checked?” asks Doug McLaughlin of Bonnet Bay. “On the other hand, minute movements from a pro might not be normally noticed but ripples on a still mask could be more easily detected. A dilemma! At least the dolls are not so hampered. Or should they don the mask for more reality?” Look. Doug’s got a bit of time on his hands. OK?

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